Thursday, July 1, 2010

Bertemu Waris

Last week there was a Temu Waris Day at my daughters' primary school. Normally we split this responsibility. I would go to the Temu Waris at the secondary school, since all my children enrolled in Form One at the school I taught, and Daddy would go to the Temu Waris at the primary school since it was not my fault that he got elected the Yang Dipertua PIBG the first time he showed up in their PIBG meeting.
But now that I am a stay-at-home mom, I can't find a single excuse to stay at home while Daddy perform his fatherly duty this year.
I spent 50 minutes getting prepared for the day-out, plus another 30 to bathe and clothe Ryan. So far, not a peep from Daddy. I knew why. He was watching 'Everybody Loves Raymond' rerun on Starworld channel. There's something about that Barone family from Long Island that taught him to be patient with the wife, no matter how long her mirror-time took.
The school prefects, including Iman and Dayana, were all lined up to greet the parents at the school main gate. Dayana broke the line when she saw us - running toward us excitedly - not to greet me, but to grab Ryan from my arms. Ryan was just as happy to oblige. As the prefects made Ryan their center of universe, the Senior Assistant came to greet us. "Tuan Haji.. terima kasih dapat datang.. mengenai rancangan kita.. ". The conversation didn't interest me, so I walked alone to I'zzah's classroom. Met Mdm Puva. She was all praises for I'zzah. I'zzah got first in class, obtaining A in all subjects except Bahasa Arab.
Daddy joined I'zzah and me as we ascend the stairs leading to Iman's and Dayana's classrooms. Met the Ketua Pemuda Pas of our Division, said the perfunctory salam and congratulated him on the birth of his third child recently.
There was a long queue of parents waiting in Dayana's class and even longer one in Iman's. So I decided to take a seat in Dayana's while Daddy went to Iman's. Ryan was giggling and making faces in the arms of one 10-year-old after another, completely oblivious to his mommy.
There were two teachers attending to the parents in Dayana's class. The parents who came before me took their turns graciously and I was just happy to observe the surrounding. There was one parent left ahead of me when one of the teachers motioned me to take the seat in front of her. I stood up and raised my right hand slightly to offer the other parent to take his turn with the teacher first. He obliged and I sat down, still in the queue. Then the teacher called out, "Meh puan duduk sekali lah.. tak pe.. apa yang saya nak cakap ni sama je.. untuk mak ayah budak-budak kelas ni.."
I should have sat stubbornly in the queue, but I didn't. That's when it got very uncomfortable for me, and especially so for the other parent, a distinguished gentleman in his 40s. First of all, we the parents weren't introduced formally by the teacher. And if that's not awkward enough to be sitting together at the crowded desk, Dayana was top 10 in the class, and the other parent's son was at the bottom 10. Dayana got mostly As and his son got mostly Cs and Ds. So the teacher went back and forth explaining our children's academic performance, completely ignoring the father's quiet demeanor, which to me, looked like utter embarrassment. It was capital A awkward.
Note to self as a teacher: don't simply throw random parents in a Temu Waris Meeting, no matter how pressed for time you are, and expect the meeting to be fruitful. After all it is a formal meeting between concerned parents and dedicated teachers. It should be done one-on-one, with or without the involved student. We should respect these parents who make time to personally come, sit and chat with us teachers about their concern and worry and may be offer us some insights on how to handle their offspring better in class. These parents in general take time off from their work (not to mention the one-hour mirror-time) to fulfill this obligation, and the least we, as teachers, can do is save them from embarrassment in front of other parents.
In Iman's class room, Pn Yap matter-of-factly pointed out to Daddy, "Tuan Haji, kita dua-dua professional.. saya rasa Tuan Haji tau apa nak buat, kan?", as she handed Iman's report card - B in all subjects, no 5 in class.
So there it is.. my first Temu Waris Day in a primary school in Ipoh.
By the way, I went to all Kushairy's and Sarah's Temu Waris Day in a primary school in Kulim. Back then, Daddy was a factory worker with no life outside the factory.




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